The baby "thinks" mom wants to hurt him. Joseph Burgo posted an interesting article about projection. Key: if I am feeling bad, someone or something is causing it. We attribute cause-and-effect between feelings and others' actions. Sometimes accurate, sometimes false. In dating, your continual criticisms cause me pain. But way you chew food drives me crazy? You're irritable, tired; falsely blame partner. Emotionally underdeveloped people frame pain as intentional aggression.

Not just "how do you dare be source of my pain", but "how do you dare do this to me intentionally". Cradle for subframes: you're aggressor, I'm victim, unfair, you're evil. Frame fights back. Full frontal, passive aggressive, dramatic, revenge. Person reacts "out of nowhere", convinced you know. Old game. Primary, can't talk out. Rings a bell in dating fights? Mom, family accused evil on purpose. Counter game codependent, borderline, narcissist. Lesbian fight vibe.

Seen everywhere, mostly women, gay guys. Men not supposed to be emotional. But we feel unfairness, accusatory shit. Learned to check self via therawness, gettinbetter. Thought natural feminine psyche—all girls like that, deal. Not worth it. Plain stupidity. Not everyone. Less we let pass, better. Feminism integral: bad happens done on purpose, men pay. Marxism: poor only thanks rich evil. Ideologies by sick people. Sicko party

No roadmap for health, but build one. Key: separate feelings from source, source from intentions. Identify three parts. Respond right. Not just negative. Good shit: deserve, meant, pedestal, idealize. Bad: push down, victim, degrade. Emotionally stupid: pleasure to pain, idealize to degrade. Own shit. In dating, feel pain without blaming intent. Source without assuming evil. Intentions without projection. Healthy bonds require this clarity.